i am a pig

I have gained a lot of weight since last year, but that's not why I am calling myself a Pig. I am neither one of those government officials whose business and sole purpose in life is to thicken their already protruding potbellies as they ceaselessly corrupt every institution in this country.

I am a pig. I was born in the year of the Pig and 2007 is supposed to be my year. Well, life has generally been good, there remains alot to be grateful for. Every time a new year comes, people become interested in fearless forecasts and predictions of what the coming year will bring us. Apparently, I am one of those people, hehe. Though we are not to take these predictions seriously, and make them rule our lives and ruin our decision-making, these stuff are plainly interesting.

While searching chinese new year sites, I came across a description of the Chivalrous Pig, that is, erm me, I found myself agreeing with some and denying others. hehe

Here goes the chivalrous pig...

Years
1923, 1935, 1947, 1959, 1971, 1983, 1995, 2007, 2019, 2031

Pig personality traits
Intellectually curious, honest and tolerant, those born in the Year of the Pig can be relied upon for their loyalty and often make true friends for life.

Like the knights of old, Pigs are often highly regarded for their chivalry and pureness of heart, and will often sacrifice their own well-being for the greater good.

The Pig can be very naive, however, and may easily fall victim to the unscrupulous who take advantage of their idealistic nature - as Pigs see everyone as loyal and caring as they are. Although forced to play the fool many times, they will just as likely hold fast to the notion that everyone is at heart decent and admirable.

Stubbornly optimistic, the Pig will not tolerate those with well-meaning advice on how to be a Pig, but since they dislike quarreling and discord their anger usually cools quickly. Sometimes looked upon as a snob, the Pig just finds it right and natural to exhibit good manners whenever possible. Their main goal in life is in serving others, and no matter how difficult circumstances become the Pig will never waiver or retreat, forging ahead in the sure knowledge that all will be well.

Pig people love to read, are generally thirsty for knowledge, and not readily talkative, but if presented with an opportunity to discuss topics of interest with like-minded individuals Pigs may find themselves talking non-stop for hours!

People born in the Year of the Pig are trusted associates in whatever career they happen to choose and often shine as entertainers, social activists or politicians.

Pigs are most compatible with : Rabbit, Sheep

Famous people born in the Year of the Pig : Lucille Ball, Humphrey Bogart, Thomas Jefferson, Ernest Hemingway, Alfred Hitchcock, Mahalia Jackson, David Letterman, Arnold Schwarzenegger

***

I wish all the good things about the Pig are true about me, haha. The not-so-good points, could use a lot of working out on moi part. Then again, the best thing is still about knowing thyself, beyond your chinese zodiacs or beyond anything else outside yourself.

let us raise a glass for a blessed and fruitful 2008...

bakit maiinis ka kay gma (isa lang sa maraming dahilan)...

sa totoo lang, hindi dapat tayo naiinis sa mga panahong ito, kapaskuhan at magbabagong taon, pero minsan, mahirap talagang hindi maapektuhan (tama bang wag na lang magpaapekto). kawawa lang kasi ang mga pilipino. at isa akong pilipino. masaklap. nakakainis. pero marami sa tin, kasama na ako, parang wala nang pag-asa na meron pang magbabago. sabi nga ni ate, "not in our lifetime". siguro, damihan na lang natin ang pampasaya, "happy thoughts" ikanga. let our happy thoughts drown the sad realities we are facing.

Link: http://www.philstar.com/index.php?Opinion&p=49&type=2&sec=25&aid=2007122598

Opinion

Where is progress in overseas jobs?
GOTCHA By Jarius Bondoc
Wednesday, December 26, 2007

It is to Arturo Brion’s credit that over a million more Filipinos landed jobs overseas this year. Given a target, the labor secretary set out to meet it. Besides, those workers would have added to the worsening unemployment and hunger had they not gone abroad. And so a total of 9 million overseas Filipino workers will remit $14 billion by end-2007. Truly manpower is the country’s bigger export than semiconductors and electronics.

It is to the government’s discredit, though, that Filipinos are finding work only by leaving their families. That 121 Filipinos leave every hour is a malady, given the demographics. Most of the men who leave are aged 29-35 years, while the women are 25-29. The government is not providing the youth with the promised bright future after college or vocational school. And as the educated youths spend abroad their most productive years, the country is also deprived of their talent.

Ironically the so-called boom in overseas placement comes under an economist President. Laymen cannot grasp what economic philosophy it is that makes Gloria Arroyo see growth in sending away the country’s best minds. Perhaps all Filipinos are dimwits and only Arroyo values which direction the country is going. All they know is that as many as three of every ten overseas worker families end up broken. Too, that children of oversees workers are likely to drop out of college because sadly unguided. And, that the officials who are supposed to assist them instead mulct them of travel money at the airports.

The government is fond of talking big — about greatness in achieving national goals through unity and all that blah. But the macro doesn’t matter to desperate families. Youths take up courses to be able to work abroad — not to be fulfilled and fruitful in chosen fields. Physical therapy, care giving and merchant marine used to be the top picks. Then, even doctors switched to nursing and women took to welding. Parents even egg supple and pretty offspring to become “cultural dancers”. Hope to get out of the poverty rut is only in dollar salaries.

It doesn’t always work out. In a growing number of cases, jobseekers abroad end up with false contracts and lower-than-agreed salaries. Or, their employers turn out to be fiends who hurt or rape and then sell them to white slavery. Or they run afoul of incomprehensible laws and land in jail. Or they simply get sick and cannot fulfill the duties they flew out to do. With 9 million Filipinos out there — a tenth of the population and a fifth of the manpower pool — thousands of them per day are bound to encounter serious trouble.

The majority of workers who survive their stint abroad fortunately are able to save enough to build homes and buy better food. Perhaps that is where the government can somehow claim credit: the economy perks up every time a worker comes home. But then again, they return uninspired to practice their trades precisely because of the very reason they left: bleak futures under bad governance. They end up going into overcrowded small businesses of tricycles.

A theory in the ’80s held that Filipinos are among several races that have missed the bus to industrialization. (Perhaps Arroyo is an adherent of that notion.) RP supposedly should no longer dream of putting up a strong steel-and-technology that manufactures machines to make other machines. It should instead focus on exporting talent as its contribution to global growth. And such talent exports should range from the highest end of scientists, engineers and surgeons, to the lowest end of a-go-go dancers, escorts and circus freaks.

If that were so, the manpower export binge would also need a steady production line. Schools have to train the workers is the spectrum of skills. But even the education system is sinking. The economist-President has not started to reverse the deterioration that everybody has been talking about for a decade.

Really, where is the economic progress there?

* * *

It’s bad enough that government, in the name of poverty alleviation, permits mountain dwellers to hunt deer and birds at will. What worsens it is that rich members of air rifle clubs take to the forests and shoot at will, as if patay-gutom. The website of one such club in Negros brags of their photos with dozens of mangled doves and mallards slung on their shoulders.

“The poachers should be punished and the penalties to be slapped should be strong enough to stop these practices and serve as a warning to others,” says Sen. Juan Miguel Zubiri, a conservationist and executive director of the Philippine Cockatoo Conservation Program and the Philippine Deer Foundation. “This is not just about ecological balance; it’s about natural heritage and biodiversity legacy,” he adds, noting that collections of insects and agricultural pests also surged in recent years.

I say just hang those macho shooters by their balls.

* * *

E-mail: jariusbondoc@workmail.com

Splender-Save It For Later

Save it for later (video)
So you're thinking about tomorrow
and all those simple things you think you might like you've been [sleeping/tripping] in the daylight you see
well, I've been trying to keep things light
So you're looking for approval
to do those stupid things your father might like
well, you might kill yourself to get it you see
but it might never make things right
it just might leave you more uptight

And all the things within the world
and all the boys and all the girls
they never seem to get enough
they save it for later you see
all the saints and all the freaks
and all the strange philosophies
the novelties and memories
they save it for later you see
they save it for later you see S
o now you're looking for some revelation
but you're still lying there still in your bed
well, I've been spilling with motions
but have you heard a word i've said

So you're thinking about tomorrow
about reliving every minute of your past
well, I'm just living for the moment you see
'cause I'm just trying to make it last
'cause I've just seen it go too fast

And all the things within the world and all the boys and all the girls they never seem to get enough they save it for later you see all the saints and all the freaks and all the strange philosophies the novelties and memories they save it for later you see save it for later you see And the best part of my life is the worst part of your day and the best part of my song is the last part you ever played And all the things within the world and all the boys and all the girls they never seem to get enough they save it for later you see

all the saints and all the freaks and all the strange philosophies and everyone that never speaks they save it for later you see and all the things within the world and every boy and every girl who never seems to get enough they save it for later you see everytime you build it up and put it in your paper cup it never seems to be enough you save it for later you see you save it for later you see don't save it for later you see your life would be greater you see

silent conversations

08.21.2007 (quarter moon)



11.18.2007 (quarter moon)



10.31.2007 (waxing gibbous?)

12.16.2007 (waxing crescent?)

lucky penny

Any Lucky Penny Lyrics

i saw a videoclip of this song for a young girl who passed on just recently. made my eyes well with tears (again, hehe...). i cried (i've been so used to crying), but i'm pretty sure i'm going to be fine soon. I'm looking forward to making my own videoclips again. i really miss the "old elf". this was the only videoclip i can download, it will probably do for now. any lucky penny will do fine ;)

ate and ea

thanks to yong for this pic :)

happy christmas everyone

someone is wishing to have a happy Christmas. others are certain that their Christmas will be joyous no matter what. while some are completely left devoid of any reason to be merry, others have contented themselves even with just the idea of a happy Christmas.

[in two weeks, it'll be Christmas once again. it is a time when merry making (should) come(s) naturally from people. in a desperate attempt to salvage the tiny specks of happiness which might have found their way into my being (and hopefully choose to stay), i am writing my christmas entry 14 days in advance, to capture the spirit while i still can. we should live every day remembering the message and feeling the spirit of Christmas anyway.]

we begin with gratitude. after Christmas, we welcome another year and it is always wonderful to water the seeds of thankfulness. no matter how trying personal struggles prove to be, there will always be many blessings to be thankful for.

• there is family and those whom you consider family. they are the people who have seen you through your highest and lowest points and have remained there, ever supportive and unwavering with their love and guidance.
• friends who remind you that you can still laugh despite problems and make your problems lighter even for just a day or two (and tell your stubborn head that there isn't any problem to begin with).
• time. the blessing of spending time with people you hold dear is priceless.
  
• hope and faith even when you have sometimes turned a wearisome face on life, keeping that tiny ember of faith and hope is a reminder that your spirit can and will remain alive.
  

gratitude is the antidote for being unhappy, or at least a first aid remedy for the weary. it somehow lifts you up from the doldrums, even when you seem to have forgotten how it is to be really happy, when smiling came as easily as breathing in air.

cheers to gratitude, we will have a happy Christmas.

dream about eggs

last night, after a usual sunday, i dreamt about eggs. hardboiled eggs to be exact, overcooked hard boiled eggs (overly hard boiled eggs), to be more accurate. three overcooked boiled eggs if you want the numbers. in the dream, i saw the eggs cracked (with the cooked white and yolk protruding out of the shell) because of the extreme heat and pressure of the boiling (will anyone please remind me of the relationship between heat and pressure? hehe). i could not recall (experts say we always have dreams, but we seldom recall the dreams we have) the preceding sequence and what happened after i found the eggs. the dream simply registered as the dream of the cracked overcooked-hardboiled eggs. so i browsed the dream sites to find out what this dream could mean:

Eggs are symbolic of something new and fragile. They represent life and development in its earliest forms and, as such, the possibilities are limitless. At times, eggs can represent captivity or entrapment. Carl Jung said that eggs represent our captive souls. Therefore, the egg in your dream may very well represent you in the most profound sense. Are you trapped in a shell or did you break out of it and are now free to soar?

Source: Dream Lover Incorporated, http://www.dreamloverinc.com

The egg is symbol of beginning of life and growth. Seeing eggs in dreams is always a positive omen unless the eggs are rotten. Eating an egg is the dream is a good sign for a lasting relationship. If you dream of finding a nest full of eggs: expect extra money in the form of a win or inheritance. Seeing a lot of colourful eggs foretells a joyful event in your family or means a lot of children. Having eggs thrown at you means that people are going to attack you. Seeing a broken or damaged egg means that you might suffer soon some small losses or bad luck.

Source: Dream-Land, http://www.dream-land.info

Eggs are a generally good omen for whatever concerns you most. They augur domestic contentment and/or prosperity and abundance. Eating eggs signifies good (or improving, if you're not well) health. If your dream involved finding eggs in a bird's nest, it predicts an unexpected windfall of money. However, if the eggs in your dream were cracked, rotten, broken, stale or otherwise unpleasant, they are a warning of disappointment through unwisely placed trust. Brightly colored Easter eggs signify a coming celebration of a happy event.

Source: Glamour dream dictionary http://www.glamour.com/horoscopes/dreamdictionary/viewsymbol?symbol_id=1109

hmmm so much for a quick dream about eggs...

....or could it simply mean that the next morning, i was destined to have overcooked hardboiled eggs for breakfast (with binagoongan and gulay)? my mother did not explain why the eggs were cracked and i didn't ask.

oh my gasss, i'm psychic.

Going Somewhere

by Walt Whitman
(1819-1892)

My science-friend, my noblest woman-friend,
(Now buried in an English grave--and this a memory-leaf for her dear
sake,)
Ended our talk--"The sum, concluding all we know of old or modern
learning, intuitions deep,
"Of all Geologies--Histories--of all Astronomy--of Evolution,
Metaphysics all,
"Is, that we all are onward, onward, speeding slowly, surely bettering,
"Life, life an endless march, an endless army, (no halt, but it is
duly over,)
"The world, the race, the soul--in space and time the universes,
"All bound as is befitting each--all surely going somewhere."

A NOISELESS, PATIENT SPIDER

by: Walt Whitman (1819-1892)

NOISELESS, patient spider,

I mark'd, where, on a little promontory, it stood, isolated;

Mark'd how, to explore the vacant, vast surrounding,

It launch'd forth filament, filament, filament, out of itself;

Ever unreeling them--ever tirelessly speeding them.

And you, O my Soul, where you stand,

Surrounded, surrounded, in measureless oceans of space,

Ceaselessly musing, venturing, throwing,--seeking the spheres, to connect them;

Till the bridge you will need, be form'd--till the ductile anchor hold;

Till the gossamer thread you fling, catch somewhere, O my Soul.

breathe me (by sia)

Breathe Me Lyrics

clash of times: sampras vs. federer

i caught the end game of the sampras-federer match up on balls tv. the even twas called clash of times, a battle between the current world no. 1, federer, and one of the greatest tennis players of all time, sampras.

i was rooting for sampras. seeing him play again, against the reigning top player no less, was nostalgic. it brought memories of not so long ago, hehe, when my sister and i used to wait for special airings of his tennis matches on espn or star sports; and how we used to bargain with the heavens to make him win his first french open, even if it meant that the other players we were rooting for in other sports (especially basketball) had to lose a game as a payoff. (we thought that in rooting for teams and players, you win some and lose some, i guess that's true about life in general.)

sampras lost 7-6, 7-6. his hair was really thinning (in contrast to federer's curly locks, which he kept from being tousled for the photo ops, much to my annoyance, another vain man, hehe). he missed his shots which could have been winners during his younger days. and yes, he still looked lousy.

but at the post-match interview, he is a happy man. he's happy although he totally misses his game. he's now a daddy to two kids.

my mother was with while i was watching and she saw me cringing every time he had unforced errors. huwag ko daw dibdibin, panapanahon lang daw yun hehe. yup, sampras had his time. it is now federer's time.

kung bilog nga ang mundo, every person will have his time on top of the world. i hope the circumference isn't too big that it takes a while for every person to experience happiness in all its profundity and shallowness. at least every one could say, he was there.

or we can just make smaller circles.

what do you really want?

Yo I'll tell you what I want, what I really want So tell me what you want, what you really really want I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want So tell me what you want, what you really really want I wanna (huh), I wanna (huh), I wanna (huh), I wanna (huh) I wanna really really really wanna zigazig ahh

who would've thought that this song from spice girls (ca.1996) can knock some sense into one's stubborn coconut shell? in most of the things life brings you, there are things which you can control and those which you can't. then again, for most of your life, you have to acknowledge that you are and must be the one largely in control (with a lot of help from a Higher being for the believers) of your own life.

the decisions you make may be influenced by several factors, among these would be events, situations, people, beliefs and principles, which you hold of considerable importance in your life. for the lucky ones, they are given choices. others claim they don't. for the ones fortunate enough to be given a choice (one should not see it as a burden to choose), it comes down to a matter of what you really want.

they say that when you focus all you energies into something you desire (or is it someone for some, haha), you pretty much get it. perhaps that is true. a lot of things becoming real start with a simple thought.

of course, you have to do what you need to do in order to make it work, but first things first: what is it that you really want?

The Road Not Taken

TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;	5
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,	10
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.	15
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference. -- Robert Frost

take a bow, play the part

Any Other World by MIKA



MIKA Lyrics
Any Other World Lyrics

on burgers and sandwiches

on our way back after the trip to the minizoo in tagaytay, we took a stop at mushroomburger tagaytay. it was a rather hurried stop because we wanted to be home before it was dark, so we ordered to go.

mushroomburger is an easy spot along the national highway in tagaytay. a few blocks from mc donald's and a several other mainstream fast food chains and restaurants.

mcdo tagaytay

i intended to take pictures of the burgers and sandwiches we ordered. unfortunately, we got a flat tire a few metres from the store and we had to eat our sandwiches along the road with the hazard sign flashing and some helpful strangers helping us out with the flat tire.and, as much as we wanted to be home before dark, well, there are things we try to avoid but still happen.

i ordered the sandwich instead of the burger. it was an entirely non-meat sandwich, and surprisingly, i enjoyed it. my younger cousins enjoyed it too, they had the mushroomburger with cheese (this one had beef patties). the sandwich was quite filling, i only ate an apple and dalandan for dinner that night and a full load of coffee and tea.

according to a friend, mushroomburger has another branch in quezon city, for some, it's the experience in tagaytay that makes the big difference. in any case, i would like to try their spaghetti next time to see if it perks up my appetite again.

moonlighting halloween

see more pictures in this album

are we a nation of fools?

the height of farce in filipino politics

Glorietta bombing a mistake, not an accident - INQUIRER.net

http://opinion.inquirer.net/inquireropinion/columns/view_article.php?article_id=96355#

by Neal Cruz, As I See It

horror stories

i am supposed to be breaking my back ghost-writing for the next three weeks, but i have my reasons for not doing that now. in a week, it'll be november and that means i'll have less time to finish that writing assignment, but i'm cool, well, trying to be cool (believe me, i just got reborn.)

september, october, november, december...

before christmas, there is undas, the closest we have as a filipino equivalent for halloween. a twin bill holiday very much anticipated by the working population, it'll be a long weekend for everyone (all saints' day and all souls' day falling on a thursday and a friday). many folks will be going home to their provinces to visit their beloved departed. it is also around this time that we hear a loads of spooky stories. horror movie marathons are aired in every movie channel, local talk shows and documentary programs feature the supernatural.


i remember the magandang gabi bayan episodes for undas. we always saw it at home together. and we'd ask somebody to wait on us to go to the bathroom afterwards. of all the horror stories, i am most afraid of spirits possessing living bodies. i can dance with the idea of having kapres and dwendes but not when it's about evil spirits. which is why one of the scariest local horror films for me (which i think my sister and i share) is patayin sa sindak si barabara. as for the international horror films, there are several which make the list:

1. sixth sense (hands down)
2. the eye
3. shutter (i think this film was quite absurd, but it still gives me goosebumps especially when i think of my scoliosis and the thought that a spirit is actually sitting on my back, causing my spine to curve, hehe)

i can't remember other films but scenes i am most scared of are those where the main character washes his face (thus closing his eyes) and finds a floating gory face inches from his own when he opens his eyes, with matching quiet, eerie mood in the background. there is a similar scene where the girl covers herself with the sheets only to find the spirit she was hiding from right under the covers! waaah!

among the popular ghost stories, the most terrifying is the one where the spirit mocks you while praying. it's like being robbed of your last defense.

but then there are the real horror stories. if you want to hear them, you need not go too far. the really horrifying stories are the ones we immerse ourselves in our ordinary days. especially when you call yourself a filipino. perhaps you get the drift.

the exorcism of emily rose will be featured on hbo at 11 tonight. my mother is looking forward to watching it together later.

i am not.

24 summers wishlist

noong ako ay naging beinte kwatro, sabi ko, sana, katumbas ng bawat isang taon na inilagi ko sa mundo mula noong 1983, mabigyan ng katuparan ang isa sa aking mga kahilingan. dahil marunong akong magbilang, at one ikwals one, meron akong dalawmput apat na kahilingan na matutupad. tutal, malapit na rin naman magpasko. baka mayroon pang bonus.

noon hindi pa ako isang nilalalang na labis na abala sa mga bagay-bagay na inaakala ng karamihan na importante, naglilista ako taon-taon ng mga kahilingan ko para sa isang taon. nilalaman ng sulatin ang mga kahilingan ko para sa sarili ko, sa mga mahala ko sa buhay, maging para doon sa medyo may nagawang hindi maganda sa akin (naisip kong mas madali itong gawin noon kay sa kapag tumanda ka na, bakit kaya?). hindi ko na alam kung bakit ako nahinto sa paggawa ng listahan na ito.

ngunit ngayon, pagkatapos ang hayatus na mahigit dalawang taon, nagbabalik ang aking wishlist.kakailanganin kong itago sa ibang pangalan o simbolo ang mga kaugnay na tao sa listahang ito. ganunpaman, alam kong magiging epektibo o mabisa pa rin ang powers ng wishlist ko.

1. mabuting kalusugan ng lahat ng taong pinapahalgahan ko
2. patuloy na mapahalagahan ang pamilya
   
3. payapang isipan at kaligayahan
   
4. para kay A, B, C (at sa mga gusto pang magpadagdag sa listahan). hindi ako kabilang dito, isinuko ko na ang slot ko para sa iba, hehe. (i-PM ako kung gusto malaman kung kasali kayo dito hehe)
   
5. wasto at mabuting mga pagdedesisyon sa buhay
6. masasayang panahon kasama ang mga taong mahahalaga sa akin
7. maraming pagkakataong magawa ang mga bagay na nakapagpapasiya sa akin at sa aking kapwa (tunog panatang makabayan na, hehe)
8. proteksyon laban sa masasamang elemento
   
9. maraming magagandang surpresa sa buhay
10. pag-unlad sa kaisipan at paggawa
11. pambili ng mga"kailangang" gadyets
12. makapagtipid ng luha
    
13. makapag-ipon ng masasayang alaala
14. bawasan ang masamang emosyon na nakakapanghina
15. matutong magbigay ng genuine na papuri sa mabuting gawa ng iba
16. mahabang inuman ng kape ng wala nang panginginig
17. magkaroon ng oras para sa pagpapaphinga at pagbabasa
18. mapangalagaan ang mga tunay na kaibigan
19. makagawa ng isang bagay na hindi pa man nagagawa
20. bawasan ang pagiging masalita, bagkus ay matutong makinig sa sasabihin ng iba
21. magpatawa ng mga nalulungkot (pati na ang sarili)
22. huwag baliwalain ang mga nakikitang mali sa paligid
23. maging cool at steady lang
24. pagtibayin ang spiritwalidad

mistulang new year's resolution ang ilan sa nakasulat sa aking wishlist. kasama syempre sa mga kahilingang ito ang kahilingan na matupad sila. hehe. sa lahat ng taong bumuo at naging bahagi ng aking beinte kwatro, salamat at mahal ko kayo maligayang beinte kwatro sa akin

losing weight

there is diet. exercise and diet. exercise. pills. slimming tea. fat-burning concoctions.then there's liposuction. a pool of consumer products and services target the weight-obsessed market. although i refuse to be labelled weight-obsessed, i'm keen on keeping my weight down, largely because, ang hirap buhatin ng sarili ko, .

my appetite is not what you would consider humongous, i seldom get second-helpings, only when mama cooks her famous adobo, hehe, it's bad for the control-you-appetite-scheme when she cooks it every week, no one can resist her adobo, otherwise, you can eat it all the days of your life, hehe. my metabolism seems to be the problem. i burn the calories slowly. i lack physical activity, and although i dissent that my dislike for sleeping has anything to do with my slow metabolism, my mother tells me, it can affect my metabolic activities too.

bmi-wise (body mass index), i still have the normal weight. but then i miss feeling lightweight. i seem to have advanced several divisions from lightweight faster than i thought. may be it comes with age, and i don't even have skinny genes on my side . while i am at it, support groups are very much welcome.

what's all the fuss with losing weight? it is not really about conforming to the common social standard that to be thin/slim is beautiful. (remember the dove campaign for real beauty? ) besides, i am the last person who would concern herself with beauty matters. I am after feeling good, more than looking wow! hehe.

simultaneous with physically losing weight, i have a lot to work on another kind of losing weight. it's time for an emotional makeover. i have scheduled an indefinite period of emotional detox program, free from useless worries and embrace freedom with a much needed release from frustrations. between these two kinds of weight-loss, the latter would certainly give me the feeling wow! i have always wanted. again, support groups are always welcome.